Lost In The Crowd

I wanted to do me,  live me and experience life as it comes, spicing it up and living it to my fullest.. Along the line,  I got lost in the crowd,  show casing what was not mine.

Down to nothing I brought calamity upon myself.... Not my initial plans yet I flowed with the rhythm to the cheers and Applauds of the crowd

My life became a deal for exchange instead of a definition.  "Beauty is vain" and regrettably I let it into my head, beclouded by the euphoria of the cheers, I savoured every moment not relinquishing the pleasures, power and prestige attached to the tag. 

I thought I had it all, recklessly I lived up my future yesterday,  throwing caution to the wind,  alluring myself in deep halos, totally forgetting the part I was supposed to thread leaving my morals and grasping vanities. 

Pray for me,  for the cut I inflicted upon myself is way deeper than you see,  I am bleeding from the chunk I cut from myself, I rebelled against my conscience and sold my soul to the devil just for affluence.

I seek total redemption and closure from all that bereves my soul, I have lost the privileges and will to be made whole. I only seek for a chance to make it right through the parts opposite eternal damnation.